How Journaling Can Help with Grief and Loss

Grief can feel like an endless wave, carrying you here and there without warning. Whether your loss is fresh or something you’ve carried for a long time, the journey of grief is very personal, and there’s no “right” way to move through it. Writing in a journal might be one tool to help you in the journey of moving forward.

Journaling doesn’t promise to take away your pain, but it can provide a safe space to let your emotions out, no matter how messy or raw they may feel. Writing lets you explore your thoughts in a way that feels authentic to you. In this article, we’ll look at how journaling can be a comforting and empowering practice to support you through your grief.

Understanding grief and the need for expression

Grief is not a one-size-fits-all experience. It doesn’t follow a neat timeline or adhere to predictable stages. Some days, you might feel like you’re making progress; other days, it might feel like you’ve been knocked back to the beginning. And that’s okay. Grief follows a personalized trajectory, and it’s important to honor your own process.

At the same time, unprocessed emotions can weigh heavily on your heart and mind. Suppressing or ignoring those feelings may seem like the easiest route, but over time, bottled-up pain can manifest in ways that affect your physical and mental well-being. This is where journaling can make a difference.

Experts have found writing can provide a healthy outlet for expressing what feels too overwhelming — or too complicated — to say out loud^[1]. Whether it’s sadness, anger, guilt, or even moments of joy and relief, putting your emotions into words can help you release some of the weight and find clarity in the chaos.

Benefits of journaling for grief and loss

There’s a huge upside to journaling when you’re going through various stages of grief. It’s never easy, and it doesn’t look the same for everyone. The ability to express exactly how you feel without fear of judgment is much more powerful than some people give it credit for.

If you’ve lost someone you loved, it’s very therapeutic to write down your thoughts and feelings as you process your new reality and take steps toward healing. The research on the benefits of journaling for grief is still limited, but some studies have found writing programs can be a helpful tool for people to process the emotions that come after a loss^[2].

Some of the more specific benefits of journaling or grief include:

Provides a safe outlet

Grief is often isolating. You might worry others won’t understand or your feelings are too heavy to share. Journaling gives you a private space to pour out your thoughts — you can be completely honest, even if your feelings seem contradictory or confusing. That’s one of the most beautiful parts of journaling: it doesn’t have to make sense, and you don’t have to explain why you feel the way you feel.

When you write, you’re free to express anger, sadness, regret, or even joy; whatever is on your heart, you can acknowledge it. There’s no need to filter your emotions. Journaling is a space that belongs entirely to you.

Find emotional clarity

Grief can make your thoughts feel tangled and hard to sort through. Writing can help you untangle them. By putting your feelings into words, you might start to notice patterns, identify what’s triggering certain emotions, or gain insights into how your grief is evolving.

For example, you might write about feeling angry one day and realize your anger stems from unanswered questions about your loss. Or, through journaling, you might discover moments of gratitude or hope you didn’t know were there. Writing helps you process the complex layers of grief and move toward a deeper understanding of yourself.

Honor the memories of your loved one

Journaling can also be a way to keep the memory of your loved one alive. You might write about favorite moments you shared, lessons they taught you, or how they impacted your life. These reflections can become a source of comfort, reminding you of the bond you’ll always carry with you.

Some people find it meaningful to create a “memory journal” dedicated to their loved ones. This journal could include stories, photos, or even things like recipes or songs that remind you of them. Honoring their memory through writing can feel like a way of keeping their presence close.

Practice self-compassion

Grief can be accompanied by guilt or self-doubt. You might question how you’re coping or feel like you should be “doing better.” Journaling can help you counter those feelings by improving your self-compassion.

Writing gives you space to acknowledge how hard this process is and remind yourself it’s okay to feel however you feel. You might write affirmations like, “I’m doing my best, and that’s enough,” or “It’s okay to take this one day at a time.” These small acts of kindness toward yourself can make a big difference in your healing journey.

Types of journaling for grief and loss

There are different ways to approach journaling as a result of grief and loss. One style may work for you but it might be completely different for the next person. The best thing is to experiment with the various types until you find the style that resonates.

Free writing

Free writing is one of the simplest and most effective ways to journal. There’s no structure or specific goal to free writing — just grab a notebook and write whatever comes to mind. Don’t worry about grammar, spelling, or making sense. Let your emotions flow naturally onto the page.

This approach can be especially helpful on days when your feelings seem bottled up. Writing without judgment or structure can help you release pent-up emotions and uncover thoughts you didn’t even realize you were holding.

Letter writing

Sometimes, the words we wish we could say to our loved ones remain unsaid. Letter writing gives you a chance to express those thoughts. You might write a letter to the person who passed, sharing what you miss about them or how you’ve been feeling since their loss.

You could also write letters to yourself, offering encouragement, reflecting on your progress, or venting your frustrations. These letters can be cathartic, and allow you to say what’s on your heart without holding back.

Gratitude journaling

Let’s be honest: you’re grieving a loss, you’re probably not actively thinking about what you’re grateful for. But experts say journaling about gratitude may help ease anxiety and depression by allowing you to reflect for a few minutes here and there throughout the day on small moments of thankfulness^[3].

Contrary to what people may think, gratitude journaling doesn’t mean you just ignore your pain. You’re trying to find a balance and notice the positive things that still exist in your life.

Maybe someone did something nice for you, an affectionate memory made you smile, or you managed to get out of bed today despite not feeling the best. Grief and joy can coexist, and journaling may help you stay grounded as you heal.

Journaling prompts for grief and loss

If you’re unsure where to start, journaling prompts can provide guidance. Here are a few ideas:

• What do you wish you could tell your loved one right now?
• What is one memory of your loved one that makes you smile?
• How have your feelings changed over time since your loss?
• What are some ways you’ve grown through this experience?
• What does self-care look like for you today?
• Write about a time when you felt supported or comforted during your grief.

These prompts are just starting points. Feel free to modify them or follow where your writing naturally takes you. Do you like poetry? Great! Use that creative avenue to get your thoughts out in a way that feels more natural than just writing them down. Perhaps poetry or songwriting in your journal is the best way for you to connect to the words you’re writing.

How to start journaling during grief

Starting a journaling practice can feel intimidating, especially when you’re dealing with heavy emotions. But it doesn’t have to be complicated. Here are some tips to make it easier:

• Start small. You don’t need to write pages and pages. Even setting aside five minutes a day can be a good starting point.
• Focus on expression, not perfection. Don’t worry about making your writing “good.” The goal is to express yourself, not to create a masterpiece.
• Create a comforting space. Find a quiet, peaceful spot where you feel at ease. Light a candle, play soft music, or bring a cozy blanket if it helps.
• Be patient with yourself. Some days, the words might flow easily; other days, it might feel harder to write. That’s okay. Give yourself grace and allow the process to unfold naturally.

Journaling isn’t about doing it “right,” it’s about connecting with your emotions and finding moments of healing.

Therapy for grief at The Center

As unpleasant as it is while you’re going through the motions, you can’t rush the grief process. Journaling can be an excellent way to cope because you give yourself space to be human and feel all the emotions, but at your own pace.
Take this process one step at a time. Healing doesn’t mean forgetting or “getting over” your loss; it means finding ways to carry your memories and your grief together. Journaling can be one small but meaningful step toward finding peace in your own time.

At The Center • A Place of HOPE, we use holistic treatment methods to provide a healing experience that reflects your values, interests, and spiritual beliefs. Mental health recovery isn’t just about looking at symptoms; it’s about helping you heal from within. And experiencing a loss in your life can absolutely affect that process.

References

1 – https://www.alexandriava.gov/sites/default/files/2023-01/Journaling%20for%20Healing.pdf
2 – https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC3003609/
3 – https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/writing-to-ease-grief